I originally got on here to check my messages and go back to bed. One of things that Carrie and I have talked about on here are books. Apparently, we have the same taste in literature. This got me to think about how the classic novels would stack-up against things from the current world.

"The Red Badge of Courage" vs. "Green Eggs and Ham." The first is about a guy trying to overcome his fear of battle. The second is about a guy trying to overcome his fear of a three-week old Egg McMuffin. Which is best? I give the nod here to "Badge," purely because it does not contain the suggestive and troubling line, "Could you, would you, with a goat?"

 "Lolita" vs. Lo Mein. One is the tale of a man who cannot get his one-track noodle off a tasty dish, the other is a tasty noodle dish. Which is best? The latter, because thinking unclean thoughts about a pile of noodles never hurt anybody.

"The Catcher in the Rye" vs. Ketchup. "Catcher" is about a troubled teenager who is constantly expelled from schools. Ketchup is a condiment which is notoriously hard to expel from a bottle. My pick? Ketchup. Fries are lousy with troubled teens..

"The Sound and the Fury" vs. the sound that management makes when you catch them in a lie. These two are pretty much the same.

"VOE Guide for LLVS" vs VOE Surveys. True, not classic literature. The first one is about the Vacuum Operated Exhaust system. The latter can be used to line your bird cage. I choose the Exhaust book because it explains how to blow hot air OUT of a tailpipe - not Up it. Enough said.

When comparing apples and oranges, you are left with mere silliness whether it is a blog or a postal stand-up. And there is always a place for classic literature in our lives which is right there -  propping up my Playstation.