Wow, time really flies even when you're having NO fun at all! lol 

Let's see, where do I even begin.  The pregnancy is still truckin' along.  I had some tests to determine my risk of having a baby with Down's Syndrome and Tay Sach's Disease.  I was relieved to learn that I'm pretty low risk for my age group.  I realize that God's in the driver's seat now....and I trust Him. 

I go in two weeks to get another ultrasound and I believe that I will be able to find out the sex of the baby at that time.  Like I've said before, as long as it's healthy....I would be happy with either a boy or a girl. 

Everyone pretty much has been informed of the news.  Most were thrilled and supportive.  My husband didn't tell the in-laws until yesterday....(which I cannot understand for the life of me)  I guess he was afraid of their reaction and by the way they reacted I guess I can't blame him now.  I wasn't here yesterday when he lowered the boom (thank God).  They have a tendency to fly off the handle and I requested to not be around to witness all the drama.  Looks like I made a good call there. 

This morning I was sitting in the front room with my oldest son waiting on his bus to come and I guess they didn't realize that I was in there because the in-laws started in on my husband.  "Just WHAT are you going to do now?"  "This is such a shock!"  "Well, SHE'S going to have to call her family and get some money" 

That one got me.  I immediately got up and took my son right by them and out the garage door to wait on the bus outside.  See the funny thing is that "SHE" moved her family to Missouri at the request of HER husband because his parents were about to lose their home and their business.  SHE at the time didn't realize the extent of all the problems they had created and the unlikelihood of them EVER getting out from under them.  SHE let HER home go into foreclosure because we couldn't afford to save both MY home and theirs.  SHE trusted her husband right from the get go and didn't ever look back but now SHE has been waiting to be treated with any ounce of respect, gratitude or decency from the in-laws SHE now lives with.   SHE deserves every bit of that and a lot more.  And yes SHE could very easily pick up the phone and call any one of my relatives to get ME the hell out of here at any time.  But SHE feels that it is her husband's responsibility to take care of his family. 

I really do love my husband, don't get me wrong.  He, most of the time, is a really great guy.   Whenever his parents and their problems get into the mix, there are major problems though.  After hearing their little comments this morning, needless to say I was hurt.  I think the pregnancy hormones have me a little more emotional than usual, because those tears at any other time would have been replaced by utter and complete FURY. 

I told my husband after the incident that IF I ever pick up the phone and call any of my family members for money, that money would not be used to get US out.....it would be used to get me and my kids out.  I told him that I trusted him in coming here and that it is solely and completely HIS responsibility to get us out.  If he chooses to shirk that responsibility and my family has to pick up the pieces then we're done. 

I'm still praying for a miracle here.  We so desperately need one.

Hope everyone is doing well.  I miss talking to everyone!

Thank you SO much everyone for your thoughts and prayers!  Whenever I need my spirits lifted or a pep talk or a swift kick in the you-know-what, I can always count on y'all.  You guys can't know how much I appreciate each and every one of you. 

Take care and know that New & Baby New love you guys a lot!

Most of you know about my big pregnancy surprise.  Because I have been told for so many years that I could never have children, it's hard for me to believe that everything will be ok.  There are VERY deep rooted fears that I just cannot shake, no matter what.  Then you take into account that I'm 37 and add in the chances of Down's Syndrome, Autism and the like, and it's enough to scare the pants right off of ya....(which may have been what got me into this situation in the first place) My husband is so shocked, I'm sure his pants will stay on for a VERY, VERY long time to come ;)

Anyway, I don't usually ask people for favors, but in this case I'm going to make an exception.  I would appreciate ANYONE out there to say a prayer for me and my unborn baby that everything will be ok.  I definately will appreciate it.  I believe whole-heartedly in the power of prayer and forces that are much more powerful than we will ever be able to understand.

Thank you so much.

As soon as 4/26th hit I was dreading the effects of the beloved mail count on my schedule.  As expected when I went in to check the schedule for the weekend...I WASN'T ON IT.  Ok, I knew this was going to happen.  I decided just to try to make the best of it and make plans to enjoy my very first Saturday off in over 8 months.  No biggie, I'll just go with the flow. 

Saturday rolls around and the phone rings in the early morning hours.   "We need you on route such n' such".  Okay!, I'll be there!  I just found out today, that I'll be working 6 days this week!  What?!?!

 Since mail count it seems that some of the old timers have decided that NOW is the time to retire.  Other RCA's have jumped ship and gone to other offices where there is more "guaranteed work".  And lots of the regulars are determined to still get a day off every now and then...go figure. 

Too early to tell, but perhaps us RCA's won't be living in cardboard boxes after all.  ??

How about them apples?  I was gonna go by the health dept. this morning to get tested and someone there recommended that I go over to Birthright to get it done today.  I went, they tested, and it came back positive.  The odds of this are probably astronomical...but then, that's been my life thus far.  Astronomical odds with everything BUT the lottery.  If somebody's gonna walk out into a storm and get struck by lightning...it's gonna be me.

Gonna set up a doctors appt. probably tomorrow and keep my fingers crossed that it's not ectopic.  Wish me luck.