What do you do when you take a boy child to Mcdonalds and they give them a girl toy in the happy meal?
You save the girl toys...that caused such offense in the first place....duct tape them to a really large left-over Fourth of July rocket...and launch those bastards into outer space! I got my set of large rockets...now I got to go to my little buddys house and send those sweet little dollies through the Orion radiation belt and onto a long term lunar vacation.
Im really hoping the duct tape or the weight of the dollies doesnt interfere with the rockets aerodynamics....and end up with them spitting sparks on top of the neighbors houses! although whatever the outcome...im sure my little bud will get a huge kick out of it !!! Pictures to follow......
"Oh Patch...you big strapping young man, you just make my poor heart race everytime I watch you load the mail in that vehicle...." She grabs him by the hand and places his palm over her rapidly pounding pulse...and proceeds to bat her fake eyelashes at him.
Patch: "You know how it is babe...gotta earn the money anyway I can...Its tough to be a sleazy biker dude wanna be and to be so pretty. This sort of job is not in keeping with my usual tough guys image.."
girl: "but patch...i just know you will work for little old me this saturday so I can be off...I got a hot date with Roman that I really want to keep. Please....isnt there something (eyebatting) that I can do to persuade you?"
Patch..."Honey...what did you have in mind?:"
girl..:"well patch, since it is you...I will never take off the day after a holiday, I will case all your mail, deliver all the adovs, whatever you want...Ill even bring you breakfast on the days that you work...just please...say you will be my sub forever and ever and never leave me.."
ENTERS THE OTHER WOMAN
OTHER WOMAN: (stomping up to snag hold of patch) " I just knew I couldnt leave you two alone without you trying to steal my love and my sub away...you good for nothing B*&^h....(shoves girl) get away from him...dont you know a good sub is hard to find?"
CAN YOU TELL I NEVER WATCHED THESE? IM NOT SURE WHAT ANYOF THEMS NAMES ARE I KNOW PATCH AND ROMAN WAS ON ONE OF THEM...JUST NOT WHICH ONE...DOES ANYONE BUT ME FEEL LIKE WORKING AT THE PO IS LIKE LIVING IN ONE? THE DRAMA JUST NEVER ENDS....
THis here car is the new POV of the future...with the decrease in volume that I keep hearing about there should be NO ISSUE with making the mail fit. According to the postal policy regarding the "size" of the vehicle...it says :
"Your personal vehicle must be large enough to accommodate the normal mail
volume and constructed to protect the mail from loss or damage." PO603
I am assuming that the "normal mail" is the volume you recieved during count...does anyone out there disagree that you could fit that volume adequately in this vehicle? I am seriously considering a small compact like this...and how can they dispute that its not adequate? oh hell who am I kidding? IM not buying another mail car...they better seriously look at the financial feasibility of the current EMA...im losing on the wear and tear...and Im not gonna accept a lose for long...it makes no sense...Any short time RCAS that hang around for this are either really desperate or morons. Im not sure desperate even applies if you look at the loss on the value of your vehicle that you are not being reimbursed for. With us being cut out of the COLA increase when all our exspenses are the same as anyone elses...its just mad not to seriously take a hard look at our carreer choices...but wait! newsflash...were not carreer employees anyhow! how we lookin now?
I for one am starting to consider that with the uncertainety and God forbid "recession" of the mail system...maybe it would be smarter to quit and come back when fuel and stuff is affordable? Come back when our Union negotiates time standards and "benefits" that we can live with? come back when the job is stable and you are paid for the actual work you put forth on their behalf? HA HA HA ,...who am I kidding? Its not looking good ! I predict a serious shortage of "available" RCAs in the postal future.
While i have been told recently that I have a negative attitude ....i beg to differ...I dont believe its negative to state the truth as I see it. And anyone who cant see that the above blog is the truth...the whole truth and nothing but the truth is an IGIT>..and thats a nice word. I reckon an optomist would look at the current EMA and see their tank half full....a REALIST looks at it and knows...that the damm thing is empty!
Once upon a time in a land far,far away.... there was a good sub who worked everyday....
She ran every route.. None to big nor to small... she'd even carry city... this RCA did it all..
SUBrella werent pretty with long golden tresses... but she was fast as hell... and cleaned up the messes....
In PO-land she was happy... the sun always shined... she worked EVERY day after... and she never whined...
Then negativity hit PO-land and things fell apart... they called for a mail count and broke the helps heart... the sky clouded over... an ominous black cloud.... and covered all of PO-land in a dark shroud...
The evil taskmaster preached teamwork and pride... and even the praise turned unbelievable and snide... favoritism and lies took center stage... and then old SUBRella got a gutful of rage...
SUBrella liked to work so they called her greedy... and that was just BAD until they got needy... no rcas would work and sent the taskmaster into a frenzy... and thats just to bad cause subrella is busy!
Subrella was was good, she was one of the best.... and was replaced by a RCA who barely passed the test... "test score is irrelevant"....the taskmaster cried... and more than a year later its obvious they lied...
Poor Subrella dont work at po-land hardly at all and her poor little pay checks shrank really to small... so she got a job scrubbing toilets and classes... she dont care who delivers the mail to the masses...
Coming real soon they sure will be sorry... when they are short and subrella gets lazy... and the triplettes get mad... and our memories hazy... that route i cant run... no way... no how... all i can say is... how we lookin now?
COMING SOON....NEXT IN THE FAIRY TALE SERIES...SUBWHITE AND THE 7 RCAS
I Am Your Worst Nightmare. I am a BAD American. I am George Carlin.
I like big cars, big hooters, and big paychecks. I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some midlevel governmental functionary with a bad comb-over who wants to give it away to crack addicts squirting out babies.
I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, you'd better do it in English. I'm not in touch with my feelings and I like it that way. I believe that it doesn't take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents. I think owning a gun doesn't make you a killer.
I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson preaches. And where does he get his money. And why is he always part of the problem and not the solution.
I believe if she has her lips on your willie, it is sex, and it is sex for both of you. This even applies when you are President of the United States.
I think that being a student doesn't give you any more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. In fact, if your parents are footing the bill to put your pansy ass through 4-7 years of college, you haven't begun to be enlightened.
I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God or gods, just leave the rest of us out of it. This also applies to sexuality.
I believe it's called the Boy Scouts for a reason. I don't think being a minority makes you noble or victimized. I don't use the excuse "it's for the children" as a shield for unpopular opinions or actions. I think fireworks should be legal on the 4th of July. My heroes are John Wayne, the Simpsons, and whoever canceled Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman. I don't hate the rich. I don't pity the poor. I know wrestling is fake and I don't waste my time arguing about it.
I think global warming is a big lie. Where are all those experts now, when I am freezing my ass through a long winter?
I've never owned a slave, or was a slave, I didn't wander forty years in the desert after getting chased out of Egypt, I haven't burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you, so shut up already.
I think the cops have every right to shoot your sorry ass if you're running from them. I also think they have the right to pull your ass over if you are breaking the law, regardless of what color you are.
I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don't want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation of the world for the next four years.
I think if you are in the passing lane, and not passing, your license should be revoked, and you should be forced to ride the bus until you promise to never delay the rest of us again.
I think beef jerky could quite possibly be the perfect food. I think tattoos and piercing are fine if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement. I think Dr. Seuss was a genius. I'm neither angry nor disenfranchised, no matter how desperately the mainstream media would like the world to believe otherwise.
If that makes me a BAD American, then yes, I'm a BAD American. If you too are a BAD American please forward this to everyone you know.
